Long Live Green Smoothies!

The powerful, magical effects of GS on some individual

See what Green Smoothies did to a health-barbarian friend:

After trying a portion of my greenish poisonous looking mixture, her imagination was soared and her creativity was boosted! And out of the blue popped up an idea for the illustration you see on the right and below:

And that's how the fight started.....

One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot
as a Christmas gift.

The next year, he didn't buy her a gift.

When she asked him why, he replied,"Well, you still haven't used the
gift I bought you last year!"

And that's how the fight started.....

Finally, computer settings I understand.

... INTERNET REALITY ....

 














My favorite: The mouse substitute!!

Way too much time in the kitchen!

Exhibitionist on action, ruuuuuun!

Mann - Frau

Die Frau kommt nach Hause: "Schatz, Schatz, pack die Koffer, ich hab

im Lotto gewonnen." Darauf der Mann "Oh, toll, fahren wir auf Urlaub?" 
"Nein, Du ziehst aus!"


Zwei Pfarrer unterhalten sich: "Du, hier ist ja überhaupt nichts mehrlos, keine Hochzeiten, keine Beerdigungen...""Ja, Du hast recht, und wenn ICH nicht ein bisschen unters Volk gehenwürde, hätten wir auch keine Taufen mehr...

Why am I married?

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
"Husband Wanted".
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."

Viennese for Americans / Canadians

A Phrase Book

 Whoa! Bummer.

 Total beschissn.

 Toe-tall bay-sheessin

 By the Committee for the Expansion and Advancement of Viennese as the
 Internationally Recognized World Language
 Edited by Scott Rhoades

Acknowledgements

English phrases: Robin Anderson, Todd Freter, Susan Purcell, Scott Rhoades
Viennese phrases: Martin Frischherz, Christian Guertler, Franz Hrazdira

 Introduction:

 "I'm sorry. I don't speak Weanerisch."